








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 367 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 119 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1873 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,791 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1686 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1217 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 2466 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 1422 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $383,222 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 426 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JETT MAIN(VAL>CS) | 86% | 14 |
| #2 | Hecrius (New Cpu) | 71% | 14 |
| #3 | Minesme | 67% | 9 |
| #4 | MaidEnjoyer69 | 64% | 14 |
| #5 | Pencil | 64% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gully | 9 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | Hecrius (New Cpu) | 5 | 0.0183 |
| #3 | Patrick | 4 | 0.0164 |
| #4 | GiGGleS | 2 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | Amyzing | 2 | 0.0078 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gully | 248 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #2 | Punchy bag | 100 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #3 | Patrick | 54 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #4 | JETT MAIN(VAL>CS) | 52 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #5 | Hecrius (New Cpu) | 50 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FluffEnjoyer69 | +4.57 | 81 | 64 |
| #2 | Patrick | +4.44 | 79 | 50 |
| #3 | Eleven | +3.40 | 71 | 72 |
| #4 | Speedfreak15558 | +2.49 | 72 | 70 |
| #5 | MaidEnjoyer69 | +2.38 | 77 | 50 |





