








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 66 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
894 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,143 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 905 | 29% |
| Smokes | 714 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 594 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 930 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $444,423 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 101 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KONNYs | 65% | 23 |
| #2 | King Chungus | 64% | 11 |
| #3 | Krunk | 60% | 20 |
| #4 | KennethS | 55% | 33 |
| #5 | Baltasar "El_Niño" Aguirre | 53% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Baltasar "El_Niño" Aguirre | 12 | 0.0126 |
| #2 | KennethS | 4 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | Krunk | 3 | 0.0071 |
| #4 | Pidar | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Zozel | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pidar | 140 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #2 | Baltasar "El_Niño" Aguirre | 105 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #3 | KennethS | 100 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | Frank | 60 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | Krunk | 55 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frank | +2.30 | 92 | 68 |
| #2 | Baltasar "El_Niño" Aguirre | +1.19 | 74 | 49 |
| #3 | Pidar | +0.52 | 55 | 71 |
| #4 | fnisp | +0.35 | 56 | 63 |
| #5 | Krunk | -0.07 | 38 | 66 |





