








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1865 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 794 matches | ||
| Faceit | 124 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 108 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6772 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,135 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2065 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1381 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 3034 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 1655 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,755,478 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2494 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | swerving drobbychan :) | 46% | 167 |
| #2 | sneidois | 45% | 365 |
| #3 | Sweaty Ass Piez | 44% | 457 |
| #4 | ched santana | 43% | 661 |
| #5 | Grugbert | 42% | 508 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Grugbert | 42% | 508 |
| #6 | pint | 41% | 123 |
| #7 | [redacted] | 41% | 253 |
| #8 | IKAK | 41% | 230 |
| #9 | Lenga Jhay | 40% | 184 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grugbert | 27 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | ched santana | 18 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Sweaty Ass Piez | 13 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | IKAK | 12 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | sneidois | 10 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sweaty Ass Piez | 988 | 0.10 | 26 min |
| #2 | Grugbert | 983 | 0.09 | 26 min |
| #3 | ched santana | 679 | 0.05 | 15 min |
| #4 | pint | 387 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #5 | [redacted] | 247 | 0.05 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grugbert | +2.81 | 71 | 52 |
| #2 | swerving drobbychan :) | +1.74 | 44 | 54 |
| #3 | sneidois | +0.87 | 44 | 21 |
| #4 | [redacted] | +0.51 | 48 | 53 |
| #5 | IKAK | +0.33 | 36 | 41 |





