








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 518 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 346 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3296 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,552 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5199 | 38% |
| Smokes | 3243 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3752 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1358 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $927,303 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 82 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nex_muffin | 52% | 23 |
| #2 | FallenPrey | 52% | 25 |
| #3 | ุุุBAREFOOTER | 51% | 78 |
| #4 | Bhein | 50% | 26 |
| #5 | koly1999 | 47% | 262 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | FallenPrey | 52% | 25 |
| #3 | ุุุBAREFOOTER | 51% | 78 |
| #4 | Bhein | 50% | 26 |
| #5 | koly1999 | 47% | 262 |
| #6 | m0joe_- | 41% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | koly1999 | 15 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | m0joe_- | 2 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | ุุุBAREFOOTER | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | Bhein | 1 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | FallenPrey | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | koly1999 | 401 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| #2 | ุุุBAREFOOTER | 302 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #3 | nex_muffin | 114 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #4 | Bhein | 48 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | FallenPrey | 38 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nex_muffin | +1.79 | 46 | 73 |
| #2 | Taco_Supreme | +1.03 | 53 | 61 |
| #3 | m0joe_- | +0.83 | 53 | 47 |
| #4 | FallenPrey | +0.27 | 75 | 34 |
| #5 | Bhein | -0.06 | 45 | 64 |





