








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 316 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
886 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,501 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 684 | 27% |
| Smokes | 698 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 502 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 617 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $338,641 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 124 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | Beirinho | 33% | 18 |
| #15 | Griffin | 30% | 10 |
| #16 | 2002 Ronaldinho | 30% | 30 |
| #17 | Vampetassssooooo | 24% | 17 |
| #18 | 04 | 21% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2002 Ronaldinho | 80 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #2 | Joao | 73 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #3 | ❤🖤Zetta ❤🖤 | 67 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #4 | duckzAo_ | 56 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #5 | saved by grace - zinho | 51 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Catta | +7.40 | 82 | 70 |
| #2 | atokzz | +6.01 | 90 | 59 |
| #3 | ❤🖤Zetta ❤🖤 | +4.66 | 59 | 54 |
| #4 | Beirinho | +2.79 | 75 | 47 |
| #5 | Zhetec | +1.90 | 78 | 64 |





