








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 218 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Anubis | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Premier | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1407 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,620 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1740 | 18% |
| Smokes | 2999 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2336 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2545 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,589,602 of utility $204 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 23 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Declan_3D | 54% | 48 |
| #2 | Pablo | 54% | 191 |
| #3 | Squid | 54% | 71 |
| #4 | Flippy Nips | 49% | 55 |
| #5 | Alanis | 48% | 172 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Sinpure | 48% | 371 |
| #7 | d4n ツ | 46% | 69 |
| #8 | ⭕⃤ SluRRY⭕⃤ | 46% | 234 |
| #9 | SJ | 43% | 120 |
| #10 | FoxySplash | 33% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sinpure | 19 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Pablo | 14 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | ⭕⃤ SluRRY⭕⃤ | 9 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Alanis | 9 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Squid | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sinpure | 1632 | 0.22 | 42 min |
| #2 | Pablo | 867 | 0.22 | 19 min |
| #3 | ⭕⃤ SluRRY⭕⃤ | 716 | 0.15 | 18 min |
| #4 | Flippy Nips | 212 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #5 | d4n ツ | 178 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sinpure | +4.96 | 77 | 82 |
| #2 | Pablo | +4.25 | 73 | 62 |
| #3 | Squid | +4.09 | 85 | 64 |
| #4 | d4n ツ | +1.88 | 70 | 65 |
| #5 | ⭕⃤ SluRRY⭕⃤ | +1.29 | 64 | 60 |





