










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2269 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 115 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 101 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 180 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




56 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11362 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 43,692 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13945 | 32% |
| Smokes | 9317 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 11258 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 9172 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,749,842 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3067 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Halo4 | 62% | 45 |
| #2 | Squid | 60% | 145 |
| #3 | d4n ツ | 59% | 222 |
| #4 | Flippy Nips | 59% | 231 |
| #5 | Pablo | 58% | 503 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Declan_3D | 55% | 130 |
| #8 | ⭕⃤ SluRRY⭕⃤ | 55% | 511 |
| #9 | SJ | 50% | 204 |
| #10 | foodHot | 48% | 371 |
| #11 | FoxySplash | 46% | 170 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alanis | 33 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | Pablo | 29 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | ⭕⃤ SluRRY⭕⃤ | 17 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Squid | 10 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | foodHot | 8 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pablo | 2226 | 0.22 | 50 min |
| #2 | ⭕⃤ SluRRY⭕⃤ | 1614 | 0.16 | 39 min |
| #3 | Flippy Nips | 915 | 0.19 | 22 min |
| #4 | d4n ツ | 568 | 0.13 | 17 min |
| #5 | foodHot | 397 | 0.05 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sinpure | +4.57 | 78 | 82 |
| #2 | Pablo | +3.89 | 73 | 63 |
| #3 | Squid | +3.31 | 84 | 63 |
| #4 | d4n ツ | +1.36 | 66 | 64 |
| #5 | ⭕⃤ SluRRY⭕⃤ | +1.09 | 63 | 60 |





