








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 96 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
314 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,219 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 451 | 37% |
| Smokes | 232 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 290 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 246 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $125,226 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 56 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Chaos | 57% | 14 |
| #6 | Koldis | 50% | 4 |
| #7 | sax0n | 40% | 5 |
| #8 | haluciniram | 38% | 8 |
| #9 | kodaz1y | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chrox | 4 | 0.0360 |
| #2 | sax0n | 2 | 0.0200 |
| #3 | Koldis | 2 | 0.0235 |
| #4 | Chaos | 1 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | kodaz1y | 1 | 0.0065 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chrox | 44 | 0.40 | 1 min |
| #2 | Chaos | 36 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #3 | kodaz1y | 29 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #4 | sax0n | 17 | 0.17 | 0 min |
| #5 | Koldis | 15 | 0.18 | 0 min |





