








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 127 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 22 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
625 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,927 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1016 | 35% |
| Smokes | 752 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 533 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 626 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $163,791 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 407 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | duby | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | raini | 69% | 32 |
| #3 | logiks | 67% | 6 |
| #4 | Ananasino | 61% | 23 |
| #5 | ADVICEONESSSHOT | 60% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Ananasino | 61% | 23 |
| #5 | ADVICEONESSSHOT | 60% | 5 |
| #6 | Supertax2 | 56% | 27 |
| #7 | u mad | 52% | 25 |
| #8 | Levko | 50% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | u mad | 7 | 0.0134 |
| #2 | raini | 5 | 0.0076 |
| #3 | ADVICEONESSSHOT | 3 | 0.0280 |
| #4 | Supertax2 | 1 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Ananasino | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Supertax2 | 77 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | u mad | 69 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | raini | 43 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | Ananasino | 23 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | Levko | 19 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ananasino | +5.34 | 91 | 45 |
| #2 | logiks | +3.82 | 90 | 28 |
| #3 | raini | +2.85 | 91 | 54 |
| #4 | u mad | +0.47 | 90 | 53 |
| #5 | Levko | -0.01 | 91 | 65 |





