










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 25 matches | ||
| Wingman | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




93 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1777 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,023 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 263 | 26% |
| Smokes | 211 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 312 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 237 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $250,871 of utility $41 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5677 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | puppyboy~ | 48% | 25 |
| #2 | Vivian~Estrogen~Bunny | 42% | 48 |
| #3 | peace:// | 40% | 35 |
| #4 | movement player | 32% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | puppyboy~ | 48% | 25 |
| #2 | Vivian~Estrogen~Bunny | 42% | 48 |
| #3 | peace:// | 40% | 35 |
| #4 | movement player | 32% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | puppyboy~ | 13 | 0.0252 |
| #2 | movement player | 7 | 0.0169 |
| #3 | peace:// | 3 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | Vivian~Estrogen~Bunny | 2 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | movement player | 38 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #2 | peace:// | 34 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | Vivian~Estrogen~Bunny | 9 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| #4 | puppyboy~ | 1 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vivian~Estrogen~Bunny | +3.68 | 60 | 25 |
| #2 | peace:// | +1.34 | 33 | 44 |
| #3 | puppyboy~ | +1.33 | 59 | 8 |
| #4 | Alice ⚧ | -2.02 | 29 | 9 |
| #5 | movement player | -4.82 | 15 | 3 |





