








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 238 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 126 matches | ||
| Wingman | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1825 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,969 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1536 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2176 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 935 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1322 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $895,739 of utility $195 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 130 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Côte de boeuf | 16 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | BlueFox73 | 8 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | C'est quoi ce poulet | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Flammenküche | 3 | 0.0076 |
| #5 | s neuil :o | 2 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Côte de boeuf | 525 | 0.16 | 14 min |
| #2 | s neuil :o | 508 | 0.16 | 14 min |
| #3 | C'est quoi ce poulet | 331 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #4 | Alyex | 182 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #5 | BlueFox73 | 70 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alyex | +7.69 | 84 | 70 |
| #2 | C'est quoi ce poulet | +2.09 | 83 | 57 |
| #3 | Côte de boeuf | +0.49 | 68 | 63 |
| #4 | s neuil :o | +0.17 | 76 | 64 |
| #5 | Jean-Tasse Duchite | -0.11 | 68 | 53 |





