








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 72 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
451 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,192 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 500 | 42% |
| Smokes | 327 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 173 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 192 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $103,058 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cracked MJ | 50% | 6 |
| #2 | BlueFox73 | 31% | 51 |
| #3 | s neuil :o | 27% | 26 |
| #4 | Côte de boeuf | 26% | 23 |
| #5 | C'est quoi ce poulet | 24% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | BlueFox73 | 31% | 51 |
| #3 | s neuil :o | 27% | 26 |
| #4 | Côte de boeuf | 26% | 23 |
| #5 | C'est quoi ce poulet | 24% | 29 |
| #6 | Jean-Tasse Duchite | 20% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C'est quoi ce poulet | 8 | 0.0143 |
| #2 | Côte de boeuf | 8 | 0.0217 |
| #3 | s neuil :o | 2 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | BlueFox73 | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s neuil :o | 86 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #2 | C'est quoi ce poulet | 66 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #3 | BlueFox73 | 49 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | Jean-Tasse Duchite | 49 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | Côte de boeuf | 49 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C'est quoi ce poulet | +3.01 | 87 | 53 |
| #2 | s neuil :o | +1.90 | 77 | 59 |
| #3 | Côte de boeuf | +0.42 | 70 | 46 |
| #4 | Jean-Tasse Duchite | -0.62 | 69 | 50 |
| #5 | BlueFox73 | -1.24 | 44 | 45 |





