








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 532 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 131 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 119 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 25 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 70 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7304 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,728 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4514 | 22% |
| Smokes | 5191 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5948 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 5075 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,903,453 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 366 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | St.Pierre | 53% | 120 |
| #7 | Jomso | 52% | 259 |
| #8 | Squidi | 50% | 58 |
| #9 | ZIISUS | 49% | 99 |
| #10 | SteelCurrent | 47% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JokuPedro | 43 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | Jomso | 26 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | Jugimeister- | 20 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | nklAs | 18 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | SteelCurrent | 13 | 0.0105 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JokuPedro | 1584 | 0.17 | 43 min |
| #2 | nklAs | 1123 | 0.15 | 33 min |
| #3 | Jomso | 568 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #4 | Jugimeister- | 257 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| #5 | ZIISUS | 230 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nklAs | +3.74 | 77 | 73 |
| #2 | osteriossi | +1.30 | 79 | 60 |
| #3 | JokuPedro | +1.25 | 68 | 76 |
| #4 | Jomso | -1.09 | 42 | 53 |
| #5 | Andreas Startklar | -1.18 | 72 | 70 |





