








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2166 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 685 matches | ||
| Wingman | 489 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 167 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




286 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10617 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,051 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4771 | 15% |
| Smokes | 8485 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 9480 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 8315 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,510,092 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1558 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jens | 52% | 96 |
| #2 | lord mobile | 49% | 350 |
| #3 | FRICKLEPICKLE | 48% | 81 |
| #4 | Heinz | 46% | 193 |
| #5 | b4ldur | 44% | 208 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | lord mobile | 49% | 350 |
| #3 | FRICKLEPICKLE | 48% | 81 |
| #4 | Heinz | 46% | 193 |
| #5 | b4ldur | 44% | 208 |
| #6 | Captain Jack Sparrow | 39% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lord mobile | 123 | 0.0186 |
| #2 | b4ldur | 107 | 0.0261 |
| #3 | FRICKLEPICKLE | 30 | 0.0192 |
| #4 | Heinz | 26 | 0.0066 |
| #5 | Jens | 12 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lord mobile | 1058 | 0.16 | 22 min |
| #2 | b4ldur | 630 | 0.15 | 14 min |
| #3 | FRICKLEPICKLE | 248 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #4 | Heinz | 151 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #5 | Captain Jack Sparrow | 122 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gus Fring | +3.12 | 38 | 46 |
| #2 | b4ldur | +1.80 | 24 | 61 |
| #3 | Jens | -1.25 | 38 | 25 |
| #4 | FRICKLEPICKLE | -2.13 | 21 | 55 |
| #5 | lord mobile | -2.97 | 13 | 47 |





