








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 47 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 134 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2014 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,902 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1774 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1460 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1606 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2062 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $459,772 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 128 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xxriotpro | 88% | 17 |
| #2 | jww | 85% | 13 |
| #3 | Xirt | 80% | 15 |
| #4 | hunter | 80% | 15 |
| #5 | colin | 66% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Mronedeag | 57% | 14 |
| #11 | chris | 57% | 23 |
| #12 | Axessor | 52% | 27 |
| #13 | Spooky Jinneah | 52% | 31 |
| #14 | Primal | 50% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sirnerd | 7 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | Primal | 4 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | Spooky Jinneah | 3 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | Archaic | 2 | 0.0039 |
| #5 | chris | 2 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Primal | 266 | 0.26 | 7 min |
| #2 | sirnerd | 197 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #3 | Axessor | 157 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #4 | colin | 155 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | Spooky Jinneah | 108 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xxriotpro | +4.39 | 93 | 58 |
| #2 | colin | +2.54 | 79 | 59 |
| #3 | sirnerd | +2.50 | 72 | 62 |
| #4 | Primary | +1.78 | 87 | 69 |
| #5 | Spooky Jinneah | +1.58 | 87 | 55 |





