








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 432 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 78 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
1334 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,068 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 864 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1137 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1018 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1049 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $486,598 of utility $198 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thiberg | 88% | 8 |
| #2 | The_Undulator | 69% | 13 |
| #3 | Bot Hjarnø | 60% | 10 |
| #4 | Baba HiddeN | 55% | 62 |
| #5 | R3FLEX | 52% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | PEPSI MAX | 50% | 10 |
| #8 | FIREFOX | 49% | 65 |
| #9 | JueLLL | 49% | 61 |
| #10 | downatello | 49% | 35 |
| #11 | P1TZO#RTG | 42% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JueLLL | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Baba HiddeN | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | FIREFOX | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | R3FLEX | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | downatello | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FIREFOX | 128 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #2 | JueLLL | 109 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | R3FLEX | 108 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | Baba HiddeN | 100 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | S4ndeR ♿ | 59 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R3FLEX | +1.81 | 64 | 64 |
| #2 | S4ndeR ♿ | +1.62 | 92 | 73 |
| #3 | Baba HiddeN | +1.41 | 64 | 78 |
| #4 | Esse | +1.37 | 77 | 70 |
| #5 | FIREFOX | +0.79 | 63 | 66 |





