








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2233 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 412 matches | ||
| Faceit | 147 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 111 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8042 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 48,447 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 16155 | 33% |
| Smokes | 13082 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 7889 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 11321 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,414,065 of utility $81 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1192 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cynx | 62% | 69 |
| #2 | Hercules_ | 57% | 177 |
| #3 | crazywombat11689 | 54% | 46 |
| #4 | wilby_ | 52% | 86 |
| #5 | Wyttle | 51% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cynx | 62% | 69 |
| #2 | Hercules_ | 57% | 177 |
| #3 | crazywombat11689 | 54% | 46 |
| #4 | wilby_ | 52% | 86 |
| #5 | Wyttle | 51% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wilby_ | 13 | 0.0073 |
| #2 | Hercules_ | 8 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Wyttle | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | Cynx | 4 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | crazywombat11689 | 3 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hercules_ | 428 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #2 | Cynx | 316 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #3 | wilby_ | 264 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #4 | Wyttle | 232 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #5 | crazywombat11689 | 117 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hercules_ | +3.02 | 88 | 55 |
| #2 | wilby_ | +1.98 | 88 | 55 |
| #3 | Cynx | +1.82 | 71 | 63 |
| #4 | Rody | +0.84 | 74 | 82 |
| #5 | Wyttle | +0.14 | 63 | 65 |





