








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 723 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 245 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 31 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




54 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4304 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,843 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4204 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3268 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2983 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2388 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $670,346 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 453 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | krm$te | 58% | 33 |
| #2 | Hujase | 57% | 74 |
| #3 | KKrap$i$ | 54% | 50 |
| #4 | Flasher | 51% | 51 |
| #5 | Dzarv1s | 51% | 93 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | KKrap$i$ | 54% | 50 |
| #4 | Flasher | 51% | 51 |
| #5 | Dzarv1s | 51% | 93 |
| #6 | nice try man | 48% | 62 |
| #7 | WoodY [LV] | 41% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hujase | 12 | 0.0083 |
| #2 | KKrap$i$ | 4 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | krm$te | 4 | 0.0055 |
| #4 | Flasher | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | WoodY [LV] | 2 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dzarv1s | 343 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #2 | Flasher | 252 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #3 | KKrap$i$ | 163 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | Hujase | 121 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | krm$te | 107 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | krm$te | +1.68 | 63 | 67 |
| #2 | Gl1zzY | +1.45 | 75 | 52 |
| #3 | nice try man | +0.66 | 59 | 46 |
| #4 | WoodY [LV] | +0.59 | 73 | 68 |
| #5 | Dzarv1s | +0.17 | 49 | 62 |





