








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 15 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 123 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




74 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1510 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,432 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 859 | 19% |
| Smokes | 747 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 1947 | 44% |
| Molotovs | 879 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $367,314 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 174 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ㊚ Bardouf ㊚ | 58% | 12 |
| #2 | High Dope. | 53% | 83 |
| #3 | Hugimo-kun | 51% | 152 |
| #4 | Shadow | 48% | 25 |
| #5 | oweur | 48% | 94 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | High Dope. | 90 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #2 | Hugimo-kun | 75 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #3 | oweur | 61 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #4 | Shadow | 46 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | ultrA | 42 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᴄᴜᴍ ᴛᴇᴀᴍ Yaqzho | +1.65 | 65 | 53 |
| #2 | oweur | +0.37 | 48 | 43 |
| #3 | High Dope. | +0.15 | 34 | 52 |
| #4 | ultrA | -0.22 | 45 | 54 |
| #5 | soso37c | -0.56 | 58 | 39 |





