








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 662 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 431 matches | ||
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 64 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5385 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,078 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4667 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4741 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4867 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 4803 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,751,785 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 150 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SCHNEE | 61% | 44 |
| #2 | DuoSan | 57% | 169 |
| #3 | ħαgeи$ | 56% | 179 |
| #4 | Shaaps | 54% | 95 |
| #5 | Blinchiki | 53% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Blinchiki | 53% | 47 |
| #6 | HaveABite | 48% | 141 |
| #7 | Tiniko@threesixtypeek | 46% | 39 |
| #8 | вroғιle | 43% | 42 |
| #9 | FueL | 36% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tiniko@threesixtypeek | 7 | 0.0091 |
| #2 | ħαgeи$ | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | HaveABite | 6 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | DuoSan | 5 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Shaaps | 4 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ħαgeи$ | 872 | 0.24 | 23 min |
| #2 | DuoSan | 385 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #3 | HaveABite | 244 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #4 | Shaaps | 240 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #5 | SCHNEE | 203 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SCHNEE | +2.88 | 67 | 70 |
| #2 | Tiniko@threesixtypeek | +1.57 | 82 | 56 |
| #3 | ħαgeи$ | +1.44 | 80 | 72 |
| #4 | вroғιle | +0.63 | 63 | 36 |
| #5 | Shindy mein lieber | +0.40 | 70 | 68 |





