








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 694 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 324 matches | ||
| Faceit | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 52 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4738 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,595 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4344 | 25% |
| Smokes | 4846 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3976 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4429 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,341,122 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 453 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SCHNEE | 56% | 50 |
| #2 | DuoSan | 55% | 199 |
| #3 | Shindy mein lieber | 54% | 95 |
| #4 | ħαgeи$ | 53% | 156 |
| #5 | Tiniko@threesixtypeek | 51% | 80 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Shindy mein lieber | 54% | 95 |
| #4 | ħαgeи$ | 53% | 156 |
| #5 | Tiniko@threesixtypeek | 51% | 80 |
| #6 | HaveABite | 50% | 109 |
| #7 | Blinchiki | 42% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DuoSan | 16 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | Tiniko@threesixtypeek | 12 | 0.0070 |
| #3 | ħαgeи$ | 10 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | Shindy mein lieber | 6 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | SCHNEE | 3 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ħαgeи$ | 727 | 0.22 | 20 min |
| #2 | DuoSan | 457 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #3 | SCHNEE | 239 | 0.23 | 6 min |
| #4 | Shindy mein lieber | 226 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #5 | Tiniko@threesixtypeek | 187 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SCHNEE | +3.02 | 60 | 73 |
| #2 | Tiniko@threesixtypeek | +1.70 | 80 | 57 |
| #3 | ħαgeи$ | +1.43 | 80 | 72 |
| #4 | Shaaps | +0.44 | 72 | 64 |
| #5 | Shindy mein lieber | +0.29 | 73 | 69 |





