








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 759 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 478 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 114 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4954 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,326 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3478 | 18% |
| Smokes | 5117 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5151 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 5580 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,681,335 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 205 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HyperKossan | 59% | 51 |
| #2 | Ruusk | 52% | 211 |
| #3 | hmm | 51% | 221 |
| #4 | Calle Wonderchild | 51% | 249 |
| #5 | Freiijd | 51% | 148 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | SsWaP™ | 50% | 216 |
| #8 | Robin ;> | 50% | 304 |
| #9 | Weuffelhjaern | 49% | 276 |
| #10 | henx | 48% | 124 |
| #11 | wakkElitO_o | 46% | 114 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Freiijd | 8 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Robin ;> | 6 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Weuffelhjaern | 6 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | SsWaP™ | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | henx | 4 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Robin ;> | 884 | 0.14 | 24 min |
| #2 | Freiijd | 678 | 0.21 | 19 min |
| #3 | SsWaP™ | 639 | 0.14 | 19 min |
| #4 | hmm | 569 | 0.12 | 15 min |
| #5 | Weuffelhjaern | 556 | 0.10 | 18 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Freiijd | +2.45 | 77 | 72 |
| #2 | Calle Wonderchild | +1.81 | 87 | 61 |
| #3 | Ruusk | +1.35 | 54 | 71 |
| #4 | hmm | +1.11 | 74 | 65 |
| #5 | bobz | +0.47 | 69 | 58 |





