










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 270 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3407 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,564 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3784 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4554 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 4100 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3126 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $941,740 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 30 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Weuffelhjaern | 50% | 135 |
| #9 | Robin ;> | 49% | 132 |
| #10 | wakkElitO_o | 47% | 51 |
| #11 | Freiijd | 46% | 52 |
| #12 | henx | 44% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bobz | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | Ruusk | 5 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | hmm | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | henx | 4 | 0.0043 |
| #5 | Calle Wonderchild | 3 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Robin ;> | 392 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #2 | hmm | 338 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #3 | Ruusk | 326 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | bobz | 288 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #5 | Weuffelhjaern | 266 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Calle Wonderchild | +2.41 | 86 | 63 |
| #2 | Freiijd | +2.28 | 77 | 71 |
| #3 | Ruusk | +1.64 | 53 | 69 |
| #4 | hmm | +1.37 | 73 | 66 |
| #5 | SsWaP™ | +0.37 | 63 | 74 |





