










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1068 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2774 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,426 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3174 | 38% |
| Smokes | 2456 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1378 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1418 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,064,279 of utility $189 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 444 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Struggler. | 51% | 43 |
| #2 | Brumal. | 50% | 22 |
| #3 | Astrovayy | 45% | 114 |
| #4 | wuggles | 42% | 223 |
| #5 | Big Pharma | 41% | 86 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wuggles | 24 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | dima | 8 | 0.0066 |
| #3 | ♡Cherry♡ | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | verysmallcats | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Struggler. | 3 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wuggles | 752 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #2 | verysmallcats | 626 | 0.17 | 12 min |
| #3 | Astrovayy | 450 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #4 | Big Pharma | 357 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #5 | dima | 188 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Astrovayy | +3.96 | 68 | 56 |
| #2 | Struggler. | +1.98 | 70 | 35 |
| #3 | dima | +1.47 | 51 | 61 |
| #4 | Ryu | +1.34 | 71 | 71 |
| #5 | verysmallcats | +0.58 | 42 | 51 |





