








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 196 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 366 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




77 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4226 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,656 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5273 | 39% |
| Smokes | 3562 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2496 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2325 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,357,771 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 146 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aminuos | 57% | 35 |
| #2 | SEED | 54% | 70 |
| #3 | [IU] Dr.Sun | 53% | 160 |
| #4 | 夜使 | 51% | 264 |
| #5 | FAZER | 50% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Emper0r | 47% | 198 |
| #10 | HARRY_HAPPY | 47% | 216 |
| #11 | Thousand bird | 47% | 90 |
| #12 | 九千七 | 45% | 65 |
| #13 | v5v5 | 41% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HARRY_HAPPY | 52 | 0.0119 |
| #2 | Thousand bird | 52 | 0.0274 |
| #3 | Emper0r | 38 | 0.0101 |
| #4 | 夜使 | 29 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | Chisato | 12 | 0.0094 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HARRY_HAPPY | 993 | 0.23 | 18 min |
| #2 | 夜使 | 979 | 0.19 | 24 min |
| #3 | Thousand bird | 510 | 0.27 | 10 min |
| #4 | [IU] Dr.Sun | 468 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #5 | SEED | 170 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thousand bird | +4.94 | 70 | 54 |
| #2 | Forsaken | +2.04 | 56 | 36 |
| #3 | HARRY_HAPPY | +1.91 | 55 | 54 |
| #4 | 夜使 | +1.44 | 50 | 67 |
| #5 | v5v5 | +0.68 | 56 | 57 |





