








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 43 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
343 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,122 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 638 | 30% |
| Smokes | 531 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 667 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 286 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $151,575 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Krabbedal | 75% | 4 |
| #2 | TeNsu Son Of Satan | 71% | 7 |
| #3 | PrincessMaja | 56% | 9 |
| #4 | OrKa | 50% | 4 |
| #5 | MultiNormann | 44% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GameAndLive | 8 | 0.0139 |
| #2 | DTX | 2 | 0.0177 |
| #3 | MultiNormann | 1 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | PrincessMaja | 1 | 0.0053 |
| #5 | TeNsu Son Of Satan | 1 | 0.0071 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GameAndLive | 78 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | levlQuattro | 64 | 0.30 | 1 min |
| #3 | MultiNormann | 29 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | TeNsu Son Of Satan | 27 | 0.19 | 0 min |
| #5 | PrincessMaja | 13 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dopher Scott | +6.66 | 96 | 33 |
| #2 | TeNsu Son Of Satan | +5.60 | 73 | 76 |
| #3 | Krabbedal | +3.30 | 78 | 44 |
| #4 | PrincessMaja | +3.22 | 51 | 57 |
| #5 | OrKa | +3.04 | 55 | 65 |





