








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1051 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 176 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 52 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




149 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7454 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,666 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7066 | 38% |
| Smokes | 3269 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 5170 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3161 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $850,131 of utility $68 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 541 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Seek | 67% | 128 |
| #2 | Parada Fofa | 66% | 32 |
| #3 | ..................... | 63% | 366 |
| #4 | hehe | 62% | 485 |
| #5 | h0rnet | 61% | 206 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hehe | 101 | 0.0105 |
| #2 | mat >_< wawawaw | 79 | 0.0227 |
| #3 | Lenda | 75 | 0.0132 |
| #4 | ..................... | 74 | 0.0105 |
| #5 | h0rnet | 22 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hehe | 2862 | 0.30 | 73 min |
| #2 | ..................... | 1082 | 0.15 | 31 min |
| #3 | Lenda | 850 | 0.15 | 21 min |
| #4 | mat >_< wawawaw | 605 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #5 | h0rnet | 448 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lenda | +1.99 | 78 | 57 |
| #2 | bombril | +1.75 | 72 | 45 |
| #3 | ..................... | +1.72 | 79 | 64 |
| #4 | xing ling | +1.59 | 69 | 63 |
| #5 | Seek | +1.49 | 79 | 58 |





