








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 857 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 148 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3228 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,714 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3695 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3022 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2421 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2576 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $565,237 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4565 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kalsa | 64% | 108 |
| #2 | AuNe | 63% | 126 |
| #3 | glennTony?365 | 61% | 23 |
| #4 | ☂Leeto | 61% | 152 |
| #5 | Siggispaghetti | 57% | 96 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Siggispaghetti | 57% | 96 |
| #6 | うらぎり | 57% | 23 |
| #7 | biag-la | 54% | 37 |
| #8 | lomo | 50% | 18 |
| #9 | Candy | 41% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AuNe | 26 | 0.0101 |
| #2 | ☂Leeto | 13 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | Siggispaghetti | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | glennTony?365 | 3 | 0.0065 |
| #5 | うらぎり | 2 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AuNe | 481 | 0.19 | 12 min |
| #2 | ☂Leeto | 309 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #3 | kalsa | 276 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #4 | biag-la | 189 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| #5 | glennTony?365 | 79 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kalsa | +2.79 | 84 | 73 |
| #2 | Candy | +1.56 | 89 | 64 |
| #3 | AuNe | +1.49 | 82 | 62 |
| #4 | yAAj9 | +1.26 | 79 | 68 |
| #5 | ☂Leeto | +1.03 | 72 | 61 |





