








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 295 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 178 matches | ||
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2377 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,781 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3000 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2788 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2437 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2556 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $654,815 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 493 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ondrey | 59% | 17 |
| #2 | Morgan | 56% | 54 |
| #3 | romi | 53% | 45 |
| #4 | romBlex | 52% | 188 |
| #5 | Weasel | 51% | 139 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | romBlex | 52% | 188 |
| #5 | Weasel | 51% | 139 |
| #6 | Jaker00 | 51% | 170 |
| #7 | Rud0lf | 50% | 202 |
| #8 | ToodlesGaming | 47% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rud0lf | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | romBlex | 2 | 0.0005 |
| #3 | Jaker00 | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | Morgan | 2 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | romBlex | 1207 | 0.30 | 40 min |
| #2 | Weasel | 669 | 0.22 | 20 min |
| #3 | Rud0lf | 303 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #4 | Jaker00 | 267 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #5 | Morgan | 213 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Morgan | +1.97 | 73 | 68 |
| #2 | romBlex | +1.27 | 64 | 85 |
| #3 | Weasel | +0.97 | 64 | 78 |
| #4 | rubidobi | +0.73 | 69 | 67 |
| #5 | ondrey | -0.06 | 86 | 63 |





