








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 206 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1694 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,023 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1536 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2509 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 1950 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1028 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $493,332 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 118 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wretched | 59% | 22 |
| #2 | b1zn4tcH! | 51% | 45 |
| #3 | onana | 47% | 30 |
| #4 | ja mes | 44% | 43 |
| #5 | ched | 41% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | b1zn4tcH! | 15 | 0.0172 |
| #2 | ja mes | 12 | 0.0159 |
| #3 | Hoshi Nova | 6 | 0.0090 |
| #4 | onana | 5 | 0.0092 |
| #5 | Matsu | 4 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hoshi Nova | 134 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #2 | Matsu | 130 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #3 | b1zn4tcH! | 75 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | Xynn | 74 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #5 | K I N G | 68 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ja mes | +6.44 | 72 | 46 |
| #2 | b1zn4tcH! | +6.29 | 75 | 54 |
| #3 | Ji×Sykes | +5.76 | 95 | 36 |
| #4 | onana | +3.30 | 72 | 38 |
| #5 | Kung King Kang | +2.15 | 66 | 51 |





