








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1070 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 201 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 140 matches | ||
| Faceit | 118 matches | ||
| Premier | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




119 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7334 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,957 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11613 | 42% |
| Smokes | 6824 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4271 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 5249 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $504,149 of utility $41 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 364 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blind Pew | 71% | 72 |
| #2 | rlx to xitando | 65% | 150 |
| #3 | Mercurase | 64% | 125 |
| #4 | Cringge | 62% | 427 |
| #5 | zer1k | 60% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Mercurase | 64% | 125 |
| #4 | Cringge | 62% | 427 |
| #5 | zer1k | 60% | 85 |
| #6 | donk666 | 58% | 65 |
| #7 | GerZe | 50% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cringge | 182 | 0.0223 |
| #2 | rlx to xitando | 57 | 0.0199 |
| #3 | donk666 | 39 | 0.0332 |
| #4 | Mercurase | 18 | 0.0075 |
| #5 | Blind Pew | 16 | 0.0117 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cringge | 2063 | 0.25 | 54 min |
| #2 | rlx to xitando | 522 | 0.18 | 14 min |
| #3 | Mercurase | 287 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #4 | GerZe | 284 | 0.39 | 8 min |
| #5 | donk666 | 258 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ByJeison | +3.03 | 73 | 69 |
| #2 | Cringge | +2.51 | 70 | 59 |
| #3 | rlx to xitando | +2.36 | 91 | 58 |
| #4 | GerZe | +1.73 | 76 | 70 |
| #5 | donk666 | +1.23 | 91 | 58 |





