








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1129 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 242 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 146 matches | ||
| Premier | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 57 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




247 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7840 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,018 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7668 | 40% |
| Smokes | 4755 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1877 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 4718 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,387,349 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 846 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mercurase | 71% | 156 |
| #2 | Blind Pew | 70% | 70 |
| #3 | rlx to xitando | 69% | 197 |
| #4 | zer1k | 67% | 140 |
| #5 | ByJeison | 62% | 427 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | rlx to xitando | 69% | 197 |
| #4 | zer1k | 67% | 140 |
| #5 | ByJeison | 62% | 427 |
| #6 | donk666 | 58% | 69 |
| #7 | TostaoF | 50% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ByJeison | 95 | 0.0115 |
| #2 | rlx to xitando | 66 | 0.0180 |
| #3 | donk666 | 43 | 0.0333 |
| #4 | Mercurase | 27 | 0.0094 |
| #5 | TostaoF | 20 | 0.0212 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ByJeison | 2523 | 0.31 | 63 min |
| #2 | rlx to xitando | 679 | 0.18 | 19 min |
| #3 | Mercurase | 347 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #4 | zer1k | 340 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #5 | donk666 | 300 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ByJeison | +3.75 | 72 | 70 |
| #2 | rlx to xitando | +3.20 | 92 | 59 |
| #3 | Cringge | +2.43 | 69 | 59 |
| #4 | donk666 | +1.59 | 91 | 60 |
| #5 | zer1k | +1.15 | 77 | 49 |





