








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 392 matches | ||
| Wingman | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4555 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,741 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4661 | 37% |
| Smokes | 2794 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 4227 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1059 | 8% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,249,456 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ RuLa | 56% | 27 |
| #2 | FUMAPERROS | 53% | 131 |
| #3 | Hai:>me | 52% | 67 |
| #4 | Solopoio | 52% | 228 |
| #5 | Dela | 50% | 105 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Solopoio | 17 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | FUMAPERROS | 9 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | Hai:>me | 7 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | Salty | 6 | 0.0064 |
| #5 | IceTrix | 6 | 0.0091 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Solopoio | 875 | 0.18 | 18 min |
| #2 | FUMAPERROS | 631 | 0.25 | 16 min |
| #3 | Hai:>me | 337 | 0.26 | 8 min |
| #4 | Dela | 271 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #5 | ✪ RuLa | 79 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ RuLa | +1.73 | 73 | 68 |
| #2 | Solopoio | +1.26 | 56 | 49 |
| #3 | galmo | +0.51 | 68 | 60 |
| #4 | Dela | +0.31 | 66 | 74 |
| #5 | Hai:>me | -0.49 | 60 | 64 |





