








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
815 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,057 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1147 | 38% |
| Smokes | 797 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 890 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 223 | 7% |
Our logs show you have wasted $208,699 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IceTrix | 59% | 17 |
| #2 | FUMAPERROS | 55% | 56 |
| #3 | galmo | 52% | 67 |
| #4 | Solopoio | 52% | 83 |
| #5 | Salty | 45% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IceTrix | 59% | 17 |
| #2 | FUMAPERROS | 55% | 56 |
| #3 | galmo | 52% | 67 |
| #4 | Solopoio | 52% | 83 |
| #5 | Salty | 45% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FUMAPERROS | 8 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | Solopoio | 7 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | galmo | 7 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | Salty | 4 | 0.0062 |
| #5 | IceTrix | 2 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Solopoio | 351 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #2 | FUMAPERROS | 256 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| #3 | galmo | 212 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #4 | Salty | 64 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | IceTrix | 37 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Solopoio | +1.46 | 54 | 53 |
| #2 | galmo | +0.29 | 67 | 62 |
| #3 | Hai:>me | -0.58 | 58 | 66 |
| #4 | IceTrix | -0.88 | 80 | 47 |
| #5 | FUMAPERROS | -1.56 | 61 | 62 |





