








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2802 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 701 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 265 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 118 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 102 matches | ||
| Wingman | 99 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 75 matches | ||
| Faceit | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 81 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




78 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
24342 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 46,282 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10150 | 22% |
| Smokes | 8095 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 15207 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 12830 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $5,186,794 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 215 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jim345 | 80% | 162 |
| #2 | Val | 70% | 376 |
| #3 | MINGE BEAST | 67% | 266 |
| #4 | mitch | 64% | 335 |
| #5 | KHABIB | 64% | 392 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | MINGE BEAST | 67% | 266 |
| #4 | mitch | 64% | 335 |
| #5 | KHABIB | 64% | 392 |
| #6 | Bxnni | 63% | 373 |
| #7 | NightlyDαωn | 62% | 827 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bxnni | 89 | 0.0128 |
| #2 | Val | 49 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | jim345 | 48 | 0.0160 |
| #4 | KHABIB | 46 | 0.0059 |
| #5 | NightlyDαωn | 32 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mitch | 1341 | 0.21 | 31 min |
| #2 | KHABIB | 1232 | 0.16 | 28 min |
| #3 | Val | 993 | 0.14 | 26 min |
| #4 | MINGE BEAST | 573 | 0.12 | 12 min |
| #5 | jim345 | 360 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LeeAm | +5.46 | 88 | 55 |
| #2 | jim345 | +3.36 | 86 | 55 |
| #3 | Val | +2.69 | 87 | 52 |
| #4 | KHABIB | +1.55 | 81 | 54 |
| #5 | MINGE BEAST | +1.43 | 86 | 56 |





