








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 837 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 130 matches | ||
| Wingman | 112 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 84 matches | ||
| Faceit | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 89 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5120 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,692 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4510 | 22% |
| Smokes | 5618 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5778 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 4786 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,311,287 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 228 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ?RAZER? | 66% | 38 |
| #2 | Supreme Leader | 65% | 48 |
| #3 | Cip0 | 60% | 75 |
| #4 | Melcers | 59% | 99 |
| #5 | Monolith | 52% | 347 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Monolith | 52% | 347 |
| #6 | Static | 52% | 184 |
| #7 | yeet | 51% | 304 |
| #8 | buu | 48% | 92 |
| #9 | Wiffu | 46% | 93 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yeet | 22 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | Monolith | 13 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Melcers | 11 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | Static | 8 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Wiffu | 5 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yeet | 1500 | 0.26 | 45 min |
| #2 | Monolith | 701 | 0.11 | 16 min |
| #3 | Static | 556 | 0.15 | 16 min |
| #4 | buu | 209 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #5 | Melcers | 195 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Monolith | +3.20 | 62 | 53 |
| #2 | ?RAZER? | +1.92 | 79 | 80 |
| #3 | yeet | +1.18 | 77 | 79 |
| #4 | Melcers | +1.12 | 67 | 65 |
| #5 | Fūns | +0.09 | 46 | 60 |





