








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1428 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 497 matches | ||
| Wingman | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 63 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




62 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8893 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,093 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4732 | 24% |
| Smokes | 5419 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5737 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 4205 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,827,023 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 635 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SomeOne | 58% | 67 |
| #2 | Mindexas | 50% | 517 |
| #3 | Teslaruris | 49% | 97 |
| #4 | Eusebio | 48% | 414 |
| #5 | $#NIKo$% | 48% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mindexas | 33 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | n47TimingChain | 30 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | BUMBUM | 15 | 0.0058 |
| #4 | Emka | 14 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Eusebio | 10 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mindexas | 1975 | 0.19 | 45 min |
| #2 | n47TimingChain | 694 | 0.06 | 15 min |
| #3 | Eusebio | 584 | 0.07 | 15 min |
| #4 | Emka | 584 | 0.11 | 15 min |
| #5 | BUMBUM | 442 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BUMBUM | +3.55 | 75 | 59 |
| #2 | .39 | +2.10 | 66 | 56 |
| #3 | Emka | +1.96 | 45 | 64 |
| #4 | Teslaruris | +1.71 | 52 | 52 |
| #5 | Mindexas | +1.09 | 29 | 64 |





