








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 280 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 263 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3151 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,533 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3049 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2571 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 3868 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 3045 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $776,123 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 876 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Absodo | 729 | 0.19 | 20 min |
| #2 | Risque-_- | 489 | 0.09 | 13 min |
| #3 | JamalJabroneWilliamson | 221 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #4 | Grakym | 141 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #5 | Steve | 128 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Steve | +3.03 | 87 | 60 |
| #2 | Absodo | +1.64 | 78 | 59 |
| #3 | Father | +0.84 | 66 | 59 |
| #4 | Risque-_- | +0.77 | 60 | 61 |
| #5 | JamalJabroneWilliamson | +0.11 | 58 | 62 |





