








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 42 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 141 matches | ||
| Faceit | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2271 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,707 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3238 | 33% |
| Smokes | 2033 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2283 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2153 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $954,702 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1084 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ninjavitis | 64% | 45 |
| #2 | Choco | 60% | 67 |
| #3 | muse | 59% | 51 |
| #4 | KENZO | 57% | 63 |
| #5 | TK Jared | 53% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Choco | 60% | 67 |
| #3 | muse | 59% | 51 |
| #4 | KENZO | 57% | 63 |
| #5 | TK Jared | 53% | 74 |
| #6 | Grizzly | 49% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ninjavitis | 12 | 0.0124 |
| #2 | Grizzly | 8 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | KENZO | 8 | 0.0060 |
| #4 | TK Jared | 6 | 0.0039 |
| #5 | Choco | 6 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Choco | 323 | 0.24 | 8 min |
| #2 | ninjavitis | 300 | 0.31 | 7 min |
| #3 | Grizzly | 228 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #4 | muse | 215 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #5 | TK Jared | 153 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | muse | +4.37 | 92 | 49 |
| #2 | ninjavitis | +3.22 | 87 | 72 |
| #3 | TK Jared | +2.36 | 68 | 51 |
| #4 | Choco | +1.89 | 64 | 70 |
| #5 | Grizzly | +0.87 | 90 | 61 |





