








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 886 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 160 matches | ||
| Faceit | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3028 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,109 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1990 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1884 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1146 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2089 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,429,008 of utility $213 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 111 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EPIC DUDE | 60% | 20 |
| #2 | Sverdfisk | 54% | 200 |
| #3 | japalenowo | 53% | 184 |
| #4 | Okalele | 51% | 175 |
| #5 | maurjegeren_SKINS | 51% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | japalenowo | 758 | 0.20 | 20 min |
| #2 | Sverdfisk | 523 | 0.13 | 13 min |
| #3 | Okalele | 262 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #4 | Chips | 126 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #5 | maurjegeren_SKINS | 88 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | japalenowo | +2.82 | 73 | 62 |
| #2 | KVASS | +1.32 | 81 | 53 |
| #3 | Sverdfisk | +1.24 | 79 | 69 |
| #4 | maurjegeren_SKINS | -0.41 | 52 | 53 |
| #5 | Okalele | -1.10 | 62 | 54 |





