








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 8 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
490 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 771 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 370 | 48% |
| Smokes | 229 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 42 | 5% |
| Molotovs | 130 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $203,113 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 12 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Bit | 46% | 52 |
| #5 | (Doodle) | 45% | 22 |
| #6 | Gcifall | 37% | 27 |
| #7 | Plinko Machine | 37% | 30 |
| #8 | Radical! | 29% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bit | 10 | 0.0104 |
| #2 | Ainsley | 7 | 0.0070 |
| #3 | Plinko Machine | 3 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | Ashh. | 3 | 0.0072 |
| #5 | (Doodle) | 3 | 0.0075 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ainsley | 221 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #2 | Bit | 75 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | Plinko Machine | 43 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | Ashh. | 36 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | (Doodle) | 30 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ainsley | +4.26 | 33 | 57 |
| #2 | Bit | +4.14 | 62 | 43 |
| #3 | (Doodle) | +0.32 | 45 | 57 |
| #4 | Ashh. | -2.00 | 15 | 17 |
| #5 | Plinko Machine | -3.57 | 11 | 36 |





