








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1813 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 682 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 320 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 225 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 132 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 188 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




99 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
20428 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 40,519 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 18040 | 45% |
| Smokes | 9182 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 11613 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1684 | 4% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,279,232 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1747 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aspw0w | 72% | 388 |
| #2 | above | 71% | 545 |
| #3 | pew^ | 67% | 532 |
| #4 | Game -_^ | 66% | 747 |
| #5 | uⁿDerWearTaker | 63% | 171 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aspw0w | 72% | 388 |
| #2 | above | 71% | 545 |
| #3 | pew^ | 67% | 532 |
| #4 | Game -_^ | 66% | 747 |
| #5 | uⁿDerWearTaker | 63% | 171 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pew^ | 77 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | aspw0w | 65 | 0.0085 |
| #3 | Game -_^ | 53 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | above | 16 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | uⁿDerWearTaker | 10 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Game -_^ | 2674 | 0.19 | 72 min |
| #2 | above | 2353 | 0.22 | 64 min |
| #3 | aspw0w | 1236 | 0.16 | 27 min |
| #4 | pew^ | 772 | 0.07 | 15 min |
| #5 | uⁿDerWearTaker | 194 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WaZzA | +4.09 | 78 | 63 |
| #2 | aspw0w | +3.66 | 81 | 61 |
| #3 | pew^ | +1.21 | 44 | 51 |
| #4 | above | +0.94 | 73 | 75 |
| #5 | Game -_^ | -1.78 | 42 | 69 |





