








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1 achievement has been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank |
|---|
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
40 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 217 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 39 | 18% |
| Smokes | 40 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 78 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 60 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $16,700 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1TapHsNohecks | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | Br0therr | 33% | 9 |
| #3 | ABUBAKIR NURBAYEV | 33% | 9 |
| #4 | Nova | 17% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1TapHsNohecks | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | Br0therr | 33% | 9 |
| #3 | ABUBAKIR NURBAYEV | 33% | 9 |
| #4 | Nova | 17% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Br0therr | 3 | 0.0159 |
| #2 | ABUBAKIR NURBAYEV | 1 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | Nova | 1 | 0.0082 |
| #4 | 1TapHsNohecks | 1 | 0.0149 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ABUBAKIR NURBAYEV | 21 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #2 | Br0therr | 19 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| #3 | Nova | 15 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| #4 | 1TapHsNohecks | 9 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1TapHsNohecks | +2.04 | 83 | 58 |
| #2 | Br0therr | +1.62 | 90 | 59 |
| #3 | Nova | +0.80 | 90 | 67 |
| #4 | ABUBAKIR NURBAYEV | -2.03 | 62 | 56 |
| #5 | JESUS KEBAB | -5.45 | 38 | 44 |





