










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 14 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
73 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 122 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 26 | 21% |
| Smokes | 36 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 23 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 37 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $23,428 of utility $44 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 78 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Keebs | 50% | 4 |
| #2 | Riddler | 33% | 3 |
| #3 | danieL | 31% | 29 |
| #4 | 0tterMan | 25% | 12 |
| #5 | Ron Stampler | 11% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Keebs | 50% | 4 |
| #2 | Riddler | 33% | 3 |
| #3 | danieL | 31% | 29 |
| #4 | 0tterMan | 25% | 12 |
| #5 | Ron Stampler | 11% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | danieL | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | 0tterMan | 1 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | Ron Stampler | 1 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | Riddler | 1 | 0.0154 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0tterMan | 59 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| #2 | danieL | 11 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #3 | Ron Stampler | 9 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #4 | Keebs | 6 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | Riddler | 6 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | danieL | +5.85 | 86 | 48 |
| #2 | Ron Stampler | +2.08 | 79 | 61 |
| #3 | 0tterMan | +0.30 | 65 | 59 |
| #4 | Riddler | -3.67 | 35 | 2 |
| #5 | Keebs | -4.97 | 39 | 49 |





