








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 578 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 108 matches | ||
| Premier | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3166 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,959 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1518 | 13% |
| Smokes | 4712 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 3036 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2693 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,128,425 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 282 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | gnf | 58% | 83 |
| #4 | 0tterMan | 49% | 313 |
| #5 | danieL | 47% | 158 |
| #6 | Keebs | 46% | 54 |
| #7 | Riddler | 45% | 202 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0tterMan | 12 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Riddler | 10 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | danieL | 6 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | gnf | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | Keebs | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0tterMan | 1442 | 0.23 | 32 min |
| #2 | Riddler | 322 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #3 | gnf | 152 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #4 | danieL | 124 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | 5318008 | 52 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | danieL | +2.10 | 72 | 42 |
| #2 | gnf | +2.10 | 82 | 60 |
| #3 | 0tterMan | +1.99 | 73 | 66 |
| #4 | Ron Stampler | +0.60 | 69 | 60 |
| #5 | 5318008 | -0.42 | 59 | 52 |





