








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 714 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 246 matches | ||
| Premier | 82 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5805 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,091 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5424 | 30% |
| Smokes | 5144 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3557 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3966 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,525,452 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 814 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Adam- | 70% | 50 |
| #2 | Tarwars | 65% | 34 |
| #3 | fiftee cent$$$ | 60% | 55 |
| #4 | Bountyhunterr* | 59% | 130 |
| #5 | HuangTong | 57% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | fiftee cent$$$ | 60% | 55 |
| #4 | Bountyhunterr* | 59% | 130 |
| #5 | HuangTong | 57% | 46 |
| #6 | Viv | 56% | 227 |
| #7 | redd. | 54% | 127 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Viv | 11 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | redd. | 8 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | fiftee cent$$$ | 7 | 0.0061 |
| #4 | Adam- | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | Bountyhunterr* | 2 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Viv | 953 | 0.21 | 25 min |
| #2 | Bountyhunterr* | 528 | 0.19 | 15 min |
| #3 | redd. | 465 | 0.18 | 12 min |
| #4 | Adam- | 258 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| #5 | fiftee cent$$$ | 213 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IseeUdere | +2.79 | 84 | 75 |
| #2 | fiftee cent$$$ | +1.63 | 81 | 61 |
| #3 | Adam- | +1.57 | 76 | 62 |
| #4 | HuangTong | +1.48 | 69 | 53 |
| #5 | redd. | +0.45 | 81 | 59 |





