








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1048 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 101 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 54 matches | ||
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




116 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6314 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,607 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7686 | 36% |
| Smokes | 4898 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3911 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 5112 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,580,242 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 745 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Slidebug_Zzz | 46% | 85 |
| #10 | minowskii | 44% | 45 |
| #11 | bird balls | 44% | 71 |
| #12 | iphone 5s | 40% | 50 |
| #13 | army man | 38% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | army man | +2.38 | 81 | 52 |
| #2 | WAAHAAA ;} | +2.33 | 82 | 65 |
| #3 | Slidebug_Zzz | +2.27 | 57 | 50 |
| #4 | reused | +1.70 | 68 | 57 |
| #5 | vlr | +0.30 | 82 | 57 |





