








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 210 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 73 matches | ||
| Faceit | 41 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1732 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,095 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 801 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1192 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1119 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 983 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $610,216 of utility $182 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 98 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | koolstof | 58% | 12 |
| #2 | Reaygun | 56% | 16 |
| #3 | Rocky Balboner | 56% | 16 |
| #4 | itsWiFi | 53% | 30 |
| #5 | haz | 52% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Floppytheflapy | 46% | 50 |
| #11 | fearLess™ | Finally! CS2! | 45% | 11 |
| #12 | Leo | 44% | 27 |
| #13 | ortieez | 43% | 47 |
| #14 | bob872368 | 41% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Captain Jürs | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | Leo | 4 | 0.0072 |
| #3 | el sassquatch | 4 | 0.0165 |
| #4 | bob872368 | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | itsWiFi | 2 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Floppytheflapy | 249 | 0.22 | 6 min |
| #2 | bob872368 | 191 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #3 | Captain Jürs | 103 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | Rocky Balboner | 84 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #5 | Reaygun | 77 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fearLess™ | Finally! CS2! | +3.64 | 88 | 41 |
| #2 | Leo | +3.30 | 76 | 51 |
| #3 | haz | +1.82 | 81 | 50 |
| #4 | bob872368 | +0.88 | 67 | 59 |
| #5 | Floppytheflapy | +0.62 | 74 | 71 |





