








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 227 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 132 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1955 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,485 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1089 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1043 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1150 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1203 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $619,968 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 156 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 차카니 | 95% | 21 |
| #2 | CRXNASTY | 94% | 18 |
| #3 | Nacas | 93% | 29 |
| #4 | みこ'^' | 88% | 129 |
| #5 | kc^ | 85% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | みこ'^' | 28 | 0.0121 |
| #2 | 차카니 | 5 | 0.0142 |
| #3 | putala | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | kc^ | 3 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | ♿Supreme | 2 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | みこ'^' | 293 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #2 | putala | 208 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #3 | so | 115 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #4 | ♿Supreme | 77 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | 21/11/22 | 66 | 0.11 | 1 min |





