








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 374 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 154 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2102 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,364 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 519 | 15% |
| Smokes | 648 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1236 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 961 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,618,464 of utility $305 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 15 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mega | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | Vlad the Inhaler | 62% | 21 |
| #3 | Sefa | 62% | 21 |
| #4 | Batman #Back | 57% | 14 |
| #5 | iTitus | 54% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☁Snakehead2_1 | 407 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #2 | iTitus | 157 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #3 | byFatalyze | 146 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | DJ Trexx | 129 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #5 | Perry the Blyatapus | 93 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Perry the Blyatapus | +3.15 | 59 | 69 |
| #2 | Vlad the Inhaler | +2.72 | 78 | 55 |
| #3 | Mega | +1.81 | 66 | 41 |
| #4 | ☁Snakehead2_1 | +1.57 | 66 | 73 |
| #5 | Batman #Back | +1.34 | 39 | 70 |





